The shirt that turns heads, starts fights in the group chat, and reminds everyone: scissoring hurts my balls. Wear it ironically. Or don't. Your call.
Yeah, you read that right.
"Scissoring Hurts My Balls" is peak dumb internet humor. Scissoring = that classic lesbian sex move (legs like scissors, you get it). The punchline? A dude complaining it hurts his junk. Absurd, slightly offensive, zero chill. It's the kind of one-liner that lives rent-free in your head after 3 AM scrolls.
Perfect for:
Guys who love self-deprecating sex jokes
Anyone gifting the most unhinged friend
Bar nights, beach days, or just flexing on the timeline
This ain't subtle. It's loud, it's stupid, and it's exactly why the internet loves it.
Grab it before it gets banned from polite society (again).
Details
Soft, lightweight 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton — that broken-in feel you steal from your roommate's closet
Unisex regular fit — true to size, comfy for everyday chaos
DTG print that won't crack or fade after a million washes
Crew neck, no itchy tags, just vibes
Designed and printed in the USA — no overseas mystery boxes
Machine wash, hang dry or low tumble — treat it right and it'll outlast your bad decisions
Made to order (no warehouse dust here). Ships in 1–4 business days production + 3–7 shipping. Hit us up within 30 days if it's not your vibe — we got that satisfaction guarantee (photo proof might be needed, keep it unused/unworn unless it's busted). Easy returns/exchanges if something's off. Check the full Return & Refund Policy.
